Chapter Three: Are you ready to act now?

You accept that you have problems in your life otherwise you would not be reading this book. Some of those problems you will attribute to drinking. And if you are still reading by now, then you are probably prepared to take responsibility for those problems, rather than blame someone else for them. After all, it's your arm lifting the bottle.

However, I suggest to you that you should put yourself in a state of mind, whereby you take full personal responsibility for all the problems in your life, whether or not you think they have been caused by drinking. When I say this, I do not mean that you should blame yourself for these problems, or that they are your fault. Everyone has problems, even though some might like to convince you otherwise. Problems are simply a part of life. And there is no need to blame yourself for them, or put yourself down about them. More importantly, there is no need to blame others for your problems, and to do so may actually be damaging for you and reduce your chances of staying off alcohol.

The reason for this is that if you blame others for problems in your life, this is really the same as saying "I can't do anything to change that problem; I can't sort it out because it's their fault - it's them that must do something about it, not me." This approach to things means that you will get stuck with some problems because you are always waiting for someone else to sort them out. And if you're thinking about changing that person's mind and getting them to behave a little more reasonably, you're probably best to forget it. It is very difficult to change other people - it is difficult to change yourself, but not nearly as difficult as changing someone else.

But why should you be taking responsibility for sorting out problems that may not be yours when they are not even caused by your drinking? You accept that heavy drinking has caused problems in your life. You are probably also aware that problems in your life have led you to drink more heavily, or to relapse to drinking in the past. If you fail to take personal responsibility for sorting out problems as best you can, then in time these problems will build up and place you at risk of a return to drinking as a means of escape. The only person you can really rely on to sort things out in the way that is in your best interests is you.

Why not empower yourself to change your life for the best?

Next page .. Chapter Three - Conclusion

How To Enjoy Life Without Alcohol index

The above information is copyright of Dr Bruce Trathen MBBS MRCPsych (2006). ISBN 0-9545164-0-0. The author grants permission for these guidelines to be downloaded, copied and distributed freely, but does not grant permission for their sale.